Day 20 – 24: Varkala. Time to reflect.

Our stay in Varkala allows us plenty of time to relax on the beach, swim in the ocean, have two pairs of trousers made and tuck in to some fresh fish and good food. We also spend plenty of time commenting on the state of the ubiquitous backpackers.

“Why do they not shower? When did they last wash their hair? What’s the deal with do the long nappy trousers? Stop walking around in bare feet. We do not want to listen to your guitar playing. Smoking a joint on the beach is not cool. Food is cheap, you can afford more than one plate of food between three of you.” Etc. etc.

Jemima is considering writing a book: ‘My bag has wheels: A thirty-something’s guide to the gap year’.

Despite the proximity of the great unwashed, we are thoroughly relaxing and enjoying the slow pace and afford ourselves some time to reflect on what we’ve observed about India so far.

Shopping:

1. Bill Murray and Richard Gere are the most prolific shoppers in Rajasthan.
2. Monsoon and Liberty’s import materials from every textile merchant, stall or one-man band without exception.

Litter:

1. India is absolutely covered in litter.
2. The concept of throwing your rubbish away is in fact, throwing your rubbish wherever you happen to be standing.
3. Cows eat cardboard. (And plastic, and paper, etc.)
4. Litter is rarely collected and only when there is a financial motivation.

The rules of the road:

1. If you own a lorry, it must be brightly painted and decorated with streamers and tinsel.
2. If you own a motorbike, you must have at least three other passengers onboard before travelling.
3. If you own a tractor it must be playing Hindi music full blast for all road travellers to hear.
4. If you drive a tuk-tuk, you can travel in any direction you please regardless of safety or any threat to your passengers’ or fellow road-users’ lives.
5. If you are a cow (or any other type of livestock) feel free to stand, sleep, or nurture your offspring in the middle of the road or highway.
6. The final rule that all road users must abide by, use your horn frequently. Do not be shy, do not be timid, the world wants to know you are on the road. And, if you have a horn that plays a tune, all the better.

If we think of any other sweeping generalisations, we’ll let you know.

Day 19: Mumbai to Varkala (Kerala). Goodbye dusty desert, hello tantalising tropics.

We are slightly disappointed to arrive in Kerala, as we hadn’t quite finished ‘Evil Love’ the second great Bollywood movie we were watching on the plane. Apparently it bombed at the box office – but we loved it. We leave the airport humming the wedding mantra from the film ‘bomb, diddily bomb, diddily bomb, don’t want no love, bomb, diddily bomb, diddily bomb, don’t need no love…’ it was hilarious. Or at least we thought so. We’d also watched a twenty-year old classic ‘The victor is the conqueror’, which is a cross between chariots of fire and grease. We highly recommend them both if you are considering your next Friday night in and need a happy ending. :-)

Kerala is immediately different to everything we’ve experienced so far. It’s a lush, tropical palm-fringed region with dense vegetation and a beautiful coastline. We arrive at Varkala, about 50 minutes drive from Trivandrum (the capital) and are welcomed by the sight of the beautiful, inviting ocean.

Varkala beach is far less touristy than some of the other areas of Kerala and with its impressive, steep red cliffs and slightly ‘hippyish’ atmosphere, it reminds us of the novel ‘The Beach’. With the beautiful surroundings and laidback café’s that line the cliff-top you can easily see the backpackers getting lost here for a while.

There is an abundance of small gift shops and places to eat, and after a quick stroll down the front, we settle in for some fresh fish curry.

Day 18: Jodhpur to Mumbai. In transit.

Crisp, white, luxurious, Egyptian cotton…soft, sumptuous, squishy pillows…a hot, powerful shower… and fresh, cooling aircon. This is the Hyatt Regency, Mumbai.

On numerous occasions during our trip we’ve criticised those people who stay in Western hotels in India and miss out on the eclectic hospitality and sights awaiting them elsewhere. For tonight, however, this is pure bliss!

As this is a short transit stop for us, there is not much point taking the hour plus journey into Mumbai and most hotels by the airport are of the Hyatt, Taj or Marriott variety. We are robbed blind by the hotel airport car service, and the mineral water at nearly seven times the price of elsewhere but boy do we have a great shower and a good night’s sleep.

Day 17: Rohet Garh. And time to relax.

We’re sitting in a beautiful garden surrounded by the sounds of birds and water fountains trickling away as Phil sips his gin and tonic and Jemima has a nice cup of tea. We have moved on from Jaisalmer and have treated ourselves to a stay at a former royal residence just outside Jodphur.

We have decided to skip Udaipur, Agra and Varanasi, replacing them with a trip down to the lush green south of the country instead. We will fly from Jodhpur to Mumbai, and then on to Trivandrum (in Kerala) over the next couple of days and felt that a bit of luxury to help us on our way was the way forward.

Jemima spends the early part of the evening in the spa having a good scrub and massage, while Phil relaxes in the gardens. We enjoy a nice bottle of wine before finally heading off to our huge room (which apparently Madonna stayed in) for a good night’s sleep.

This is definitely our cup of tea…

Day16: Jaisalmer. Dreaming of home comforts.

Okay, anyone who thinks sleeping on sand is going to be comfortable is wrong! We wake with aches and pains from spending a night in a cold and smelly tent. We are so ready for deluxe right now!!!

After feasting on dry toast and honey for breakfast…we’ve spent several nights dreaming of bacon sandwiches…we get back on our camels.

It’s a shame the trip isn’t slightly longer, as there is plenty to see as the camp is set in the midst of a national park. There is wildlife everywhere, you just need to take the time to stop and look around properly. Desert wildlife moves around when it’s not too hot, and as we set off it’s early enough to see foxes, gazelle, vulture, eagle, bee-eaters and all sorts of other bird life. The dunes themselves are a latticework of tracks left by beetles, mice, birds and other wildlife.

We ride nice and slowly back to our Jeep in the village. We are in serious need of a shower – we smell of mothballs – and have dreamt about bacon, steak and wallowing in a hot bath!! It’s definitely time for another change of plan and pace?

We have been looking at our next few destinations and weighing-up what we have learnt so far. In essence we have underestimated the time and effort it takes to get from place to place in India by car and train, whilst overestimating the amount of time we need in each place to do ‘the sights’. So as we wait for our shower water to heat up, we plan our next move.

However, before we have time to wash the sand out of our hair, the owners of Fifu take up Phil’s kind offer to photograph their new project, Jasmine Haveli. We traipse around the new hotel, which is beautiful, but definitely work in progress, and even find ourselves in some of the pictures. The owners are over the moon with the results and I have a feeling that come April next year when they have completed their new website it will be filled with Phil’s photos, as well as one or two of us, looking dishevelled and not so fresh from the desert.

Day 15: Jaisalmer. Desert safari.

Today we have our desert safari.

We stop off at numerous monuments on our way out further into the desert, including some more cenotaphs and a Jain temple the size of Thumbelina’s house. Not literally, but it’s amazingly small.

We arrive at our camel camp ready to saddle up and set off into the dunes. Phil has done his best to explain how unpleasant this ride is going to be, but actually – it isn’t that bad. It’s not horse riding that’s for sure, but when you’re up and walking pretty slowly, the ride is actually not too uncomfortable. However, there’s no denying that camels must be one of the ugliest and stinkiest animals ever.

We’re taken on an hours ride through the beautiful dunes of the Thar desert, led by children! Luckily, the camels look in no hurry to rush off anywhere or shake off their guides or else we may be requesting slightly older navigators. We finally arrive at our camp just in time for sunset, which is beautiful.

Our guides strike up a fire and starting cooking this evening’s dinner. One of the boys sits with us as we build a small campfire to keep us warm into the evening.

We have a newly-wed Indian couple with us who work as translators enabling us to find out more about this young lads life. We wrap up against the cold in jumpers and scarves and this young lad has bare feet and a thin cotton shirt. He says he has left his jumper at home, but we’re not so sure. He’s 13 years old (looks about ten) and has already left school. In India, you have to pay to go to school in pretty much most of the country, so not only is this a cost for the family, but the loss of a child being able to help out earning money means that sending a child to school is too much of a financial burden. His story is not unique. Out in the villages this is a common theme – at least in what we’ve seen of Rajasthan so far.

One of the other major problems for this region is the lack of rain. Jaisalmer is currently experiencing a major drought, which is having a huge impact on its residents. All of the lakes have dried up and there is barely any grass for the camels to eat, let alone the impact on farming. According to the guides, a child can easily get to seven years old without having seen rain.

However, we manage to have a cheerful evening, singing songs around the campfire and trying to teach the boys how to take photographs with the different cameras that the group have brought with them. There’s almost a full moon and we go to sleep with plenty of light and the sounds of the desert to keep us company.

Day 14: Jaisamlmer. A huge sandcastle.

Following advice that the fort is a 10 minute walk away and easy to find (well it is sitting atop the only hill for miles around and visible from everywhere) we head off to explore running the usual gamut of dogs, pigs, cows, camels and, of course, people. This is our first exposure to Jaisalmer residents and the experience is a good one. The people (generalisation warning) are polite and respectful, take ‘no’ for an answer and look you in the eye with a sense of personal pride. We like it already.

The fort is made of beautiful yellow sandstone built straight out of the sandy rock, which makes it looks like a giant sandcastle.

We manage to find the entrance to the fort and start to walk around the narrow alleyways of this ancient place – seems the newest things here (other than mobile phone installations) are about 400 years old! This is much smaller than many of the forts we’ve seen so far and without trying we navigate our way to the top of the fort for a commanding view of the surrounding desert. This fort is a completely different scale; it’s small, intricate and gives you the impression that it’s a fortified town rather than a fort created for battle (Ranthambore Fort for example housed 14,000 troops at its peak). However, what it lacks in defensive armour, it gains in detailed beauty. Some of the buildings here are amongst the most detailed and intricately carved we have seen. It also has an abundance of tiny stalls and shops selling the usual textiles and leather goods and Jemima manages to pick up a pair of camel leather flip flops – the camel most certainly died of natural causes…!

Beyond the main gates we thread our way along narrow streets bustling with stalls, shops, handcarts, pedestrians and all the other usual road traffic. It’s hot, about 30 degrees in the shade and we pop-out onto the ‘ring-road’ on the wrong side of town. We have a long, hot and dusty walk back to the calm and quiet of Hotel Fifu and feel like we deserve a rest – which is what we work at for the rest of the afternoon J

Day 13: Travelling on the road west to Jaisalmer.

Today we head west to Jaisalmer, 100km away from the Pakistan border. It takes four and a half hours by car, though with well-maintained roads that are pretty much free of traffic, the journey is far more pleasant.

Jaisalmer is in the Thar Desert, sand and camels all around, and has a significant army presence as a result of its proximity to the Pakistan border. It is pretty much closer to Pakistan than to anywhere else in India and the fighter jets make regular patrols to the immediate west of the city.

We arrive at the Fifu guest house, named after our host Fifu ;-) and strike an instant bond with a quick ‘mera naam Jemima/Phil hai’. (Answers on a postcard please.) The hotel is made out of pretty yellow sandstone, looks great (like an old Haveli), and we have our own balcony area that looks out to Jaisalmer fort or we can make use of the rooftop restaurant above us. Yay. Fingers crossed, this looks like another good find.

Inside the hotel is no disappointment with everything constructed from the same local carved and dressed yellow stone.

By 17:30 the surroundings are still full of the sounds of local building and improvement projects. We have travelled over 1000 Kilometres and the one constant is that India is an unfinished project!

However, final judgement of course will be made on hotel Fifu by our tummies! Tonight, we’re heading to the rooftop restaurant and will report back tomorrow on whether Fifu get’s a yay or a nay. J

Day 12: Jodhpur. Out and About.

Potters, farmers and rug-makers are our delights for today as we head out on a tour of some of the rural villages surrounding Jodhpur. We are collected at 8:00am by a series 1 Land Rover from 1952 and a Willys Jeep from 1957 (I wonder who wrote that bit!) and head off to witness a different way of life.

First is a pottery village. The guy throwing the pots is skilled to say the least, using a wheel that is in fact a hand powered, 100kg round slab of sandstone, spinning on a wooden pivot! From this primitive arrangement he produces a range of shapes and sizes of clay pots in a short time. There are around 60 families in the village, according to our guide, and about 50% of them are potters, handing the skill down through the generations.

Secondly we visit a farmhouse where around nine people live in four small buildings. The lady of the house was busy pounding cow dung with her hands (nice) to use as flooring or fuel. Neither of which seem particularly appealing options to us but in actual fact the cow dung floor (that we’re walking on) is pretty impressive. Cow dung aside, they have a few animals (buffalo and cows) and grow Millet, Lentils, Sour Gum for the cattle and various other produce. Recent times have been tough due to drought. A good monsoon season would contain four or five rains of around four hours. Last year saw only two rains of an hour apiece. The harvest was down 75% but on the whole the people were in high spirits and all seemed well. The farmer demonstrated the use of opium in a drink and we were all so brave that we refused to try it.

Phil finally manages to blend in with the locals.

Our third stop was a carpet weaving family that creates mainly cotton mats in a variety of sizes and colours. All is done by hand with a smallish sized mat taking up to two months to complete. They definitely should think about automating that process!

Last stop before heading toward town was a Sheppard family with a flock of approximately 40 goats and numerous children. Not one of the most successful of stops, we’re not actually shown anything, just offloaded into the family home while the guide waits to answer any of our questions. Hmmm. We leave quite promptly.

For the cynics who have been here before, it is only the next and final stop that is overtly commercial! On our way back to Jodhpur town we are taken to a ‘small factory’ for textiles! In here we are shown pretty much the same stuff we have seen in Jaipur and Jodhpur. While our Canadian companions manage to appease the sales team by buying a bedspread and some cushion covers, we amuse ourselves by explaining to the salesman that we’ve paid significantly less than he is asking for identical products in Jodhpur market a couple of days before. We escape without buying anything and return to Ratan Villas for a shower, lunch and a lazy and relaxed Sunday afternoon.

Having gone through so much poverty on route from Ranthambore to Jodhpur, it was so pleasing today to see villages that were clean, healthy and self-sufficient.

Tomorrow we’re on the move again.

Day 11: Jodhpur. Palaces and Gardens.

After a relaxed morning we ask Jitu, what we can do for the afternoon and subsequently head out to the palace and then to Mandore Gardens.

The palace is an impressive sandstone building that the Jodhpur Royal family started building in 1929, completing in 1943, and was designed by Lancaster of London. After independence the local taxes went to the government rather than to the Maharajas and this is no doubt one of the reasons why this impressive palace now fulfils three functions: 1) A small museum about the creation of the building, 2) a 5* hotel run by the Taj group and 3) the home of the Maharaja and his family. There’s actually very little of the palace you can look around…I guess that’s left for the privilege of those happy to pay for the 5* hotel.

On to Mandore Gardens which in days gone by were the royal gardens of the wives of the Maharaja. The setting is beautiful with lots of park and flowers, but the temples and small fort are in a significant state of disrepair. Although there are signs of restoration, it is clear that there is no concerted effort to restore the gardens to their former glory. This is a shame. However, we manage to amuse ourselves by charging five rupees to every small child that comes along saying “photo, photo”!

Day 10: Jodhpur. Things are on the up.

We wake after a great night’s sleep and reflect on the fact that the two best places we’ve stayed so far in India have been the two that are the least expensive. Ratan Villas is approximately £38 a night and it’s just perfect.

We are also feeling in high spirits as we increase our knowledge and use of Hindi, much to the amusement and smiles of the locals.

After a hot shower (hurrah) and breakfast, we head off to the Mehrangarh Fort with a quick stop off at the Fort's mausoleum.

Pic 1: The beautiful mausoleum.

Pic 2 and 3: Jem and Phil's skills impress the locals...

Pic 4: The local spinning tops.

Mehrangarh is an imposing fort built straight out of the rocks keeping a watchful eye over Jodhpur.

In 1459 Rao Jodha laid the foundation of what was destined to become one of the mightiest forts of all time; Mehrangarh, Citadel of the Sun. Today, the beautiful palaces and dazzling Period Rooms of the Fort have been converted into a unique museum that houses an impressive collection of palanquins, elephant howdahs, cradles, minature paintings, weapons, turbans…the magnificent heritage of the Rathores of Marwar-Jodhpur. (Okay, that’s straight out of the guide but it’s an accurate description!)

This place is amazing. On the outside it’s a hugely impressive rock fort, but inside it’s beautifully and intricately designed and built. It’s unbelievable to think that the two can go so well together. The current Maharaja was ordained in 1952 at the age of four when his father was killed in a plane crash. He is the first to live as a ‘normal person’ not a ‘King’ as a result of independence in 1948 where the Maharaja system was dissembled in favour of democracy. However, the Royal families are still revered by their people and the current Maharaja plays a hugely significant role in continuing the local traditions and restoring and educating people on Jodhpur’s heritage.

Winding our way down from the fort through the streets of the ‘blue city’ we are faced with some sights! Jemima seriously wishes she was wearing wellies rather than flip-flops and both of us are praying we do not fall over. I’m not sure our tetanus jabs would cover us for whatever’s around here!

We make it to the bottom, and having already realised that Jodhpur is a much calmer and more respectful city than those we’ve visited so far we decide it’s time to try the market. Everything is being sold here. Chillies, spices, veg, clothes, everything. Phil is offered some black pepper and Viagra, both of which he kindly declines – what are they trying to spice up? A carefully placed ‘Naheen Dhanyavad’ (no thank you) works wonders. After meeting every man and his dog that sells to Liberty’s of London and Monsoon, we manage to pick up a few Christmas presents before departing.

Pic 1: The colourful bazar.

Pic2: Still not used to the locals.

Pic 3: The not so colourful side to India.

Today has been a really lovely day. Jodhpur is very different to the other cities and we do not feel harangued and harassed at all. Jodhpur has definitely restored our faith in India, which was seriously dented by Ranthambore. We are really happily amazed by the difference in the people here from some we have encountered.

Day 9: Travelling. A very long day.

The route from Ranthambore to Jodhpur is not an easy one. We can wait an extra day and take a nine-hour train (and stay another night in Jungle Niwas!) or get a driver. Amazingly we chose a driver knowing full well this will be a long day and plan for a 6:30am exit.

Nine and a half hours later we arrive exhausted and dusty in Jodhpur. We arrive at Ratan Villas, our next hotel, and have our fingers, toes and legs crossed, praying that it will be better than Jungle Niwas (frying pan vs fire etc.).

We are greeted at the gate by our hotel manager, a delightful man called Jitu, and shown around this beautiful villa. We are over the moon. An old house / villa; opened to guests ten years ago and the family still run the business and live there. He shows us to our room. It’s huge, beautiful. The bathroom is fabulous with a big sunken marble bath and two showers. We almost hug Jitu we are so impressed and pleased, and I’m sure Jitu thinks we are the most excitable people ever! Quite apart from the fact that Jitu is impeccably smartly dressed and we look a fright.

After watching our first TV for over a week – Miss Congeneality – hilarious – we head downstairs to the beautifully laid out courtyard for dinner. The villa courtyard is more like something you would see in southern France or even Morocco and we are warmed by a lovely fire in the centre. Dinner is delicious and we have our first red wine since arriving in India. Indian red wine at that. It’s delicious and welcome!

Tonight, we sleep very well.

Pic 1: Traffic, India style. Pic 2: Our fabulous new hotel!

Day 8: Ranthambore. Tiger hunt.

We have requested a Jeep safari (max 6 people) not a ‘canter’ (a bus with 20 to 28 seats) and are justified in our pickiness when we see one of these cobbled together buses broken down yards from the park entrance.

Last night was COLD. Guessing the temperature to be around 3 or 4 degrees C. Jemima spent the night in Phil’s cashmere woolly hat, and it was a pleasure to get up to put warm clothes on at 6:15am. Into the Jeep and off to the park with driver, naturalist and 4 other guests to find our Tigers.

Travelling around looking like aged folk in bath chairs, wearing winter coats and blankets over our shoulders and legs we entered the park. Three hours got us deer, crocodile, many many species of bird but no Tiger, Leopard or Sloth Bear. Looks like we have to stay around a while longer!

So, it’s afternoon, we head out again for another three hour safari, surely we’ll be luckier this time…deer, deer, deer, oh different – a gazelle…deer, deer. Before we were quite amazed to see deer, now we feel like we should have taken a trip around Woburn Safari park! Then, a noise; a warning call from the deer. We wait in anticipation, there’s a tiger nearby. We wait, we wait, we wait…and then we drive off. No tiger today as the park shuts at 17:30 and we can’t wait around any longer!! Boooooooo!

Thoroughly fed up with our cold tent and musty blankets, Jungle Niwas, Ranthambore and with no tigers to lift our spirits, we decide to move to Jodhpur and plan our escape. Tonight is thankfully warmer than the night before and our spirits are higher with the knowledge that we no longer have to stay an extra day and can head for Jodhpur tomorrow. However, the night’s sleep is still broken by all sorts of noises – including a train that took 6 minutes to pass and at it’s closest sounded like it was running through the centre of the tent :-O

Day 7: Jaipur to Ranthambore. Great expectations.

After seeing the pictures and hearing the stories of the beauty and splendour of Ranthambore, a key element of the Indian Government’s ‘Project Tiger’, it was with huge anticipation that we set out from the Pearl Palace Jaipur to travel the 130kms to Sawai Madhopur – the nearest town and train station to Ranthambore.

Before leaving Jaipur there was just time for the very nice Mr Singh, owner and proprietor of the Pearl Palace, to show us pictures of his Grandfather (who served in two world wars and earned an OBE) and of his latest project; a ‘heritage’ hotel in Jaipur. After being bowled over by Mr Singh and his current establishment we were similarly impressed by the pictures of the fantastic hotel he is building a short walk away, our only regret being that we were too early to stay at his new place too. Good luck Mr Singh, you thoroughly deserve it. Anyone wanting to see the pictures should, apparently, Google Mr and Mrs Singh Jaipur and see for themselves.

So, reservations at the ready we once again run the gauntlet of the beggars, hawkers, cripples and the tuk tuk drivers of India’s poverty stricken streets in order to make it to the railway station on time. Cutting it fine, we toil up and down the platform trying to decipher the carriage order to no avail and when the train arrives we end up sprinting along the platform with baggage in tow to get to the right seats…elbows at the ready. We are in ‘CC’, which is the best on this train although not quite the impressive experience of our first time! After 2 hours 20mins we arrive in Sawia Madhopur and get collected by a driver to take us to the Jungle Niwas (Jungle Rooms) and to start our Ranthambore adventure.

Firstly, the driver doesn’t know where he is going and has to collect a guide along the way. Then we drive towards a large and impressive ‘palace’ only to turn away into farmland at the last minute.

Secondly, as we arrive at the Jungle Niwas we realise in an instant that this is the most over sold hotel (we use that word advisedly) we have even seen.

As for ‘Jungle’ it is surrounded on all sides by acres of ploughed field, as for ‘luxury tented accommodation’ we have mouldy tents, no hot water (see heating system picture), the place is run by inexperienced ‘boys’ and we are staring at staying 3 nights. Depressing? Clearly they are exploiting the national park’s proximity to the maximum.

We meet the stand-in host, who is nice enough, but then proceeds to tell us that we can’t do a safari or anything else and informs us that we are tired and we need to rest!!! (It’s 1.30pm and all we’ve done so far today is sit on a train…)

“Do we like horse-riding?”

“Oh, yes, that would be good.”

“How many horses do you have?”

“One.”

“Oh.”

“One of you can ride around the block, then get off, then the other can ride around the block.”

Oh dear…

After explaining that we do not want to rest, or ride independently around the block on a horse, we want something to do, a little relief comes 30 minutes later when we are taken to see Ranthambore Fort ruins. The location and Fort are truly impressive with palaces and temples dating back between four hundred and sixteen hundred years. The fort has a perfect defensive location and we marvel at the wildlife that has made a home here since the human population moved to Sawai Madhopur many years ago in particular the hundred of black face langur monkeys, always a bonus. One of the most impressive things about the Fort is how cleverly it was constructed all those years ago. Without giving too much away, there’s ‘confusing doors’ to send enemies straight into the Moat, Elephant proof entrances and all sorts of other things to make you marvel.

Back to the Jungle Niwas and by the time we get to our ‘hotel’ the sun has gone and the temperature has dropped from today’s high of approx 28 degrees and it is starting to get chilly. The nights in here are cold and we spend a cold time sitting round a campfire ‘fire pit’ talking to other guests before a rather basic dinner and bedtime. The night threatens to be a cold one with a bright clear sky, and no heating, we ask for two extra blankets…. And use them immediately.

Day 6: Jaipur. Lazy days...

Having been told by Shabbir during our first five minutes with him that Jaipur can be done in two days...we soon realised that he was right all along. So after a bit of a lay-in and a very lazy breakfast we head off to Kerala Ayurvedic Massage Centre to detoxify. Described in the book as in the 'posh and green' area of Jaipur, we were slightly surprised (though not really) to find ourselves turning up around the block in the same dusty suburb as our hotel. Fancy that, we're staying in the 'posh, green' area of Jaipur.

Our Kerala Ayurvedic Massage Centre was pretty much the front or back room of someone's house and it had a far too small piece of curtain separating the two massage areas. Phil was thoroughly disappointed as his 'masseuse' turned out to be a 'masseur', who loving rubbed him all over with scented oils! ☺ ☹

The oil we chose smelt like Vicks Vapour Rub, so we were pleased to know that we would be clearing our sinuses at the same time as relaxing our muscles. Our faces were scrubbed to within an inch of their lives and we now look rather more tanned than when we went in! But, for £17 each for a massage and facial who were we to complain.

Having showered and cleaned off the remaining Vicks Vapour Rub we are now ready for our final Pearl Palace curry. Night all. x

Day 5: Jaipur and Amber. The sights.

We are meeting Shabbir and the Chapatti Express to go to Amber (the old capital). On the way we call in at the Gaitor, seemly off the tourist route, and the cremation site of the kings of Rajasthan since the building of Jaipur. This place has to be seen to be believed – ornate marble mausoleums to rival any we have ever seen anywhere in the world, and built in local and Italian marble. This place is a beautiful and tranquil place all the better for not being flooded with tourists.

Up to Amber and the forts and palace. To say this place is amazing would be to stretch the superlative. We walk through the usual layers of hawkers up to the palace and into this stunning complex of buildings and gardens, chambers and terraces, corridors and pavilions before finally getting lost and having to navigate the maze back to the entrance. The picture of the lives of the Kings of India pre-English rule was impressively and indelibly painted for us.Humbled both by the scale of the forts and palace and our ignorance of this land, its history and people we head for a coffee break away from the heat and dust of winter. It must be 28 in the shade, how anyone copes when the temperature can reach 50 is anyone’s guess.

Shabbir is now giving us the distinct impression he is tired of us and with a thinly veiled discussion about looking forward to spending the afternoon with his children, he drops us back at The Pearl Palace and is off to find his next paying customer.

(Shabbir - Talented capitalist)

A bit of rest and recuperation is required, before we head up to the rooftop restaurant for more curry!!

Day 4: On to Jaipur.

It’s with mixed feelings that we get up at 4:40am to catch the 6:05 from New Delhi station to Jaipur. (Mainly the getting out of bed bit to be brutally honest). But the first time on a train in India was always going to be an adventure.

So we hop out of bed bright eyed and bushy tailed to get a taxi to the station. Delhi was largely still sleeping which aided our quick escape. Arrive at the station – not quite a passage from Shantaram but… by the time Phil had paid the cab our luggage was on the heads of two porters who knew where and when our train would be – and we trotted after these guys straight to the point on the right platform where our carriage would stop. These guys are good. Only lesson – negotiate a price before they get hold of your luggage.

The train was actually pretty impressive. It arrived 30 mins ahead of scheduled and departed exactly on time. With our first class tickets, we were in two seats with lots of legroom and it even had phone and laptop sockets in the wall – though we felt that might reduce the train speed by 50% so were not too keen to try them. Throughout our five-hour journey we’re brought tea and biscuits, newspapers, breakfast and water. Very impressive indeed. The train arrived in Jaipur only 30 mins late, which was nothing to complain about given British Rail’s track record.

Jaipur – The Pink City.

Jaipur is great. You notice the difference immediately when you step off the train from Delhi. The air seems much fresher and although it’s still slightly crazy it’s much calmer than Delhi. We arrive at our hotel ‘The Pearl Palace’ and it’s great. For £12 a night we have a basic but totally elaborately decorated room, with hot water shower. The hotel has a fantastic restaurant on the roof, which serves an extensive Indian menu as well as other food.

With a hop and a skip we head in to Jaipur with the tuk tuk driver (Shabbir) whom we have for two days at far too high a price (we’re terrible hagglers!).

The roads are not quite as busy as in Delhi but they are no less chaotic. The lorries seem to be replaced by cows, camels and elephants. We do the major sights of The City Palace, Jantar Mantar (the 18^th Century royal observatory) and then the Hawa Mahal (an elaborate façade to allow the ladies of the harem to view the colourful market scene below). We then head to the Monkey Palace. Feeding pigs, cows, goats and of course monkeys is an education as we climb to a temple overlooking the city in the late afternoon sun. Back down the hill to our driver Shabbir we mount the Chapatti Express (his Tuk Tuk) to be shown some of the best shops in town – no pressure! After buying no bed linen, scarves, carvings, etc much to the disgust of the shopkeepers we head back to the hotel for a shower and a great dinner sat next to a lit brazier - necessary given the evening chill. (Peter Stacey eat your heart out – best curry ever)

Day 3: Delhi. Time to escape.

Forget the blending in, we decide to take a day trip out of Delhi and head for the palace at Pataudi and the bird sanctuary at Sultanpur.

The trip to Pataudi is through the development zone towards the south of the city and provides our first glimpse of the modern Delhi – huge shopping malls and office blocks uniquely juxtaposed totally insufficient infrastructure and the ‘shanty town’ world.

However, it doesn’t take too long to get to the real countryside and we arrive at the Pataudi Palace to take a look around both the old and new palace as recommended in our guidebook. The man on the door has no recollection of an old palace and the new palace is basically an old country house hotel. Having paid the entry fee (which includes lunch) we soon realise this is not quite what we expected. It’s completely deserted with the exception of the two of us wandering around with no idea what we should be doing. It is however, an oasis of calm 60km from the heart of Delhi – it feels for all the world like stepping into an English country house in the 1930s on a hot summers day. The walls are lined with pictures of Oxford cricket and hockey teams, there is a billiards room, and a rose garden. We have a tasty lunch of curry and off to Sultanpur hoping not to get bored too quickly.

We arrive at Sultanpur and for once actively seek the help of a guide. We are introduced to Sanjay and get taken on a wildlife-spotting journey of a lifetime. Seeing 65-70 species of birds, deer (blue bulls!!) and cows has us in the park for nearly 3 hours and Sanjay did not want us to go. We had found something to recommend to everyone – and when you get there ask for Sanjay, a dedicated, passionate and knowledgeable naturalist (and a very nice guy too).

Going ‘home’ to Delhi was something else entirely – two small traffic jams mean 30 minutes each – road chaos in the dark and the distinct impression that the collective sense of humour was evaporating in the drivers aiming to get home at the end of a hot and busy day. Delhi punished us for escaping with a 55km journey of 3.5hours!

Day 2: Delhi. Seeing the sights.

With pashmina in tow (bound to blend in) we head out for day 2 and some sightseeing. And what do you think is the most interesting sight in the whole of Delhi?! Jemima, apparently!

The Red Fort is absolutely amazing. It’s huge and very impressive. It’s also a haven of peace and tranquillity amid the rest of the chaos. To top it all off it’s world heritage week and entry is free – whaa whoo!!

Venturing across the road, past the hawkers, beggars, tuk tuk drivers and everyone else that wants a piece of us, we head to Jami Masjid (a very big and impressive mosque). Handily, they let us in minutes before prayer time, so before we’d even had a chance to say ‘what a big and impressive mosque’ someone comes running after us to kick us out unceremoniously. It wasn’t the right time or place to tell them perhaps they shouldn’t have let us in in the first place!!

On to India gate – Delhi’s impressive war memorial. Phil, blending in to the background marvellously, manages to be accosted by a lady who happens to be selling tiny, crappy, paper Indian flags the size of a postage stamp which of course were raising money for her orphan school! Jemima on the other hand is blending perfectly with the local youth – every small group of teenagers needs a photo of themselves with the Jemima vying to be the most famous Jemima in India (watch out Khan)!! Tomorrow, we positively, absolutely must blend in more!!

Humayun’s Tomb, next on the trail. Not just another monument but another truly impressive set of ornate buildings in a quiet corner of the city. This could be a in a different country given how tranquil the gardens and temples are. The name is slightly misleading as it’s many temples, tombs and shrines in a complex created by Humayan. After a thoroughly exhausting day we head back to the hotel and another Indian take away J.

Day 1: Delhi. A whole world of crazy

Delhi is a crazy place!

In Aravind Adiga’s book ‘The White Tiger’, the main character describes Delhi as a crazy city. He’s not wrong. It’s dusty, hazy, smoggy and noisy. The buses are built to take 60 but carry 160. The traffic goes both ways up a street regardless of the rules and rickshaw’s, tuk tuks, taxi’s, buses, cars and people all jostle for space on the streets. The pavement and roads blend seamlessly into one and traffic goes in any direction. The whole city is currently under construction (for the 2010 Commonwealth Games). Everything is being done at once. The roads, new metro lines, stadiums, refurbishment…everything being done – and nothing looks anywhere near completion. Most of the work seems to be done with bare hands with the odd exception of a pneumatic drill being used by a man in sandals!!

Anyway, the ardent adventurers we are, having found our hotel and had a bit of nap we venture in to Delhi – Connaught place – for a bit of a look around. We are the only tourists and so blend into the background perfectly with our white skin, western clothes and Delhi guidebook! Luckily, a nice young gentleman who just happened to be passing by is more than willing to help us. Funnily enough the way we were heading is terrible, but he will help us by taking us down some random alley to the ‘one and only’ tourist information shop. Here we go…

Having left the shop with only a free map – hurrah – our friend has kindly waited for us to point us in the right direction. We give our thanks and manage to shake him off. Luckily enough though we meet another very kind young gentleman – also just passing – who is happy to point us in a similar direction. WE ARE FAR TOO POLITE!!!!! Amusingly, this other ‘random’ passerby happens to be wearing the same shoes as our first friend. How about that?! 21 million people and two guys that are not connected wearing the same shoes. Eventually, we confirm that we want to go back in the original direction, and to his disappointment manage to say goodbye. On our way back…oh yes…you’ve guessed it. Tomorrow we will leave the book at home and try much harder to blend in!!

We sit in the park (not yet brave enough to eat or drink in any of the places we’ve seen) and watch the world go by. As it starts to get dark we decide to get a tuk tuk home, only the one we’ve chosen has absolutely no idea where our hotel is but of course says he can find it ‘no problem’. Our journey takes about an hour (hotel is approx 20 mins from town) but Phil eventually spots something he recognises and we’re out and walking on Delhi roads in the dark. Having made it back into our hotel safely away from crazy Delhi, there’s absolutely no way we’re heading out again tonight. So, in true adventurer style, we order ourselves an Indian take away!!

P.S. Happy Anniversary Dani and Pete. (18th Nov)

We're on our way....

We are so excited and can't wait to get to Delhi. Fun of Terminal 5 before that though.

For those like me with a map in their heads our route is:-

London - Delhi - Jaipur - Ranthambore - Jodhpur - Jaisalmer - Udaipur - Agra - Delhi - Varanasi - Delhi - Dehradun - Delhi - London ; phew, after that we'll need a holiday :-)

We're on our way...

Ok, last day in the UK for five weeks - hurrah. Have finally managed to close our rucksacks although I have a feeling it's not going to be so easy on the way back.

Blog, set up...as you can see. Have no idea how I get this out to you guys but I have a feeling people will now have to register for googlemail. I know....we're probably not worth the effort. But for those of you that have made it to our blog spot we thank and salute you. Although given most places we're going to in India have warned us that the electricity goes off...frequently...I'm not sure why I think I'll be sitting there with high speed internet access! But hey ho.

Anyway - see you all soon.
Jemima and Phil.